Do Not Let This Happen To You

Ok, so this story is from a while back but everytime I see this picture, my legs get itchy. This is Cosmo, a big bulldog who is a bit of a psycho. His Dad always comes in sorry for his naughty behavior, and is happy to see when other dogs put him in line. You see, Cosmo is like a roasted marshmallow. Hard on the outside, gooey on the inside. He tries to be so rough and tough, but when you yell at him to sit down or wipe his dirty face wrinkles he bows down and submits. But he's scary, so it was a risk to find out that if you stick your finger in his wrinkle he will shut up.

Cosmo literally just walks around barking... for no reason. Absolutely no reason. And then he will run into a crate, with the door open, get angry, and bark even more ferociously. It's like he's saying "let me out of this crate!" but the door is open... and he went in himself... and he can get out, so I'm like... yea.

Anyways, angry bulldog barking for a 7 or 8 shift can get very annoying as I am sure you can imagine. By the end of the day when I start feeding dinner, he continues to try and push past me and bolt into the kitchen so I have to relent and let him in. Then, I trick him into a crate so that I can feed the pups who need their dinner. He gets so freakin pissed, but he calms down after a while and lays down for a bit.

But one day in the summer, he would not stop barking, and he literally followed me around licking my legs all day. It made him calm to lick my legs so I let him continue just to shut him up. Well, ladies and gentlemen, bad idea! Do not let dogs lick you for a prolonged period of time. I should have known not to do this due to the fact that I break out in a rash everytime I change laundry detergent, and seem to get rashes in New York City. One of the perks of moving here was a) no poison ivy/poison oak and b) less mosquitoes. But when you work at a dog daycare and a crazy bulldog licks your legs you get a rash! I was literally tearing my legs to shreds for weeks until one day I walked in after crying all morning because it just wasn't going away. My boss and one of the owners took pity on me and with their help I was able to finally get some good medicine to help. But let this be a warning to you. Do not let bulldogs (or any dog or cat for that matter) lick you for a long time or ever. My mother now always checks in to make sure that I am wearing pants to work. Oh Cosmo.