Milton the Poop Eating Genius

Ok, I have been trying to post a video of Scout drooling for the past week, and it won't work. So, I have decided to just tell you all a story about another French Bulldog named, Milton.

He was at the first dog daycare that I worked at, so I don't have a picture of him on my new phone, which is a shame because he was the funniest looking bully ever. Here's the deal with Milton. He's crazy. And I love him. He was always itchy so he was always scratching himself, and sometimes he would tend to get very close to his eyes and face and cause scabbing on his face. We were worried he might jab himself in the eye so we would put a cone on him to try and hinder his constant scratching. But it didn't really work.

Anyways, what I also failed to mention is that Milton was like, the poop eater extraordinaire, so this putting on the cone business just made his poop eating skills stronger! Picture a crazy french bulldog with a cone on... he sees a pile of poop. He walks (or more like runs) over to the doodie and goes to eat it and the cone stops him from being able to reach it, because the cone hits the floor and leave his face and dirty little frenchie lips about an inch away from the prize. So, does he give up? No. He then starts to walk, with his face (and cone) on the floor over to the wall area, while dragging to doodie pile with him. When he gets to the wall, you would think he has been outed and can't go anywhere from there, but think again bitches! He lifts his head and cone up the wall, bringing the doodie up with him and then when it is safe and sound in his cone, he opens his mouth and gobbles down that scrumptious doodie. What a fuckin sicko! I couldn't believe it when I first saw it, I didn't even stop him because I figured he couldn't eat poop with a cone on! Ravenous dogs with cones on can barely even eat their dinners because of those cones, but Milton did not let a silly cone stop him from doing what he came to daycare to do, eat poop. He would waltz away happy about his midday snack with poop all over the inside of his cone (which I incidentally would have to clean thank you very much).

But I loved him. He was my absolute favorite dog at the Dog Spa and I ain't ashamed to say it. I mean what dog would be that determined about poo to do that? Only, Milton. Oh, and then he would attempt to jump up on my lap with a doodie covered cone. Sweet Jesus, I miss him. Wait, is he the sick one, or am I for missing that little poo eater? Eh, who cares, would someone mind passing the poop, please?